This occurred early this morning.
I don’t think this was a dream but it was dreamlike. Before bed I took 100mg B6. A short while later I went bed and listened to a 61 points of light relaxation exercise then a 30-minute binaural audio track. While listening the binaural track, I repeated my intentions to remember my dream, to know in a dream that I was dreaming, and to see me hands and become lucid.
I must have drifted off to sleep. Around 1:30 AM I became aware that I was no longer asleep. My eyes were closed, I was aware that I felt warm and was lying atop the bedsheets. I could also hear the air conditioner when it kicked on. I don’t recall waking from a dream though that’s possible and I didn’t remember the dream.
Random images began to appear in my mind. They were mostly swirls of dark colors – red, green, brown, black – and they seemed to be kind of hallucinogenic or psychedelic, like how you see an acid trip portrayed on TV. Occasionally, there would be more cohesive images which seemed to be centered around the New York Central railroad trestle in my hometown.
I suspected that these images might be hypnagogic or hypnopomic and I might be on the verge of falling back asleep so I tried to repeat my intentions but the words would be replaced by these images. When I would repeat the intention to see my hands when I was in a dream, sometimes I’d see my hands though not clearly and they seemed to be detached from my body (almost like a ghost image). The image of my hands would attempt the fingers through the palm reality check but the fingers wouldn’t pass through.
I finally decided that I wasn’t going to fall asleep so I wrote it down in my dream journal notebook. My handwritten account is a bit out of order so I put it in a more chronological organization as I transcribed it into my digital dream journal.
The railroad trestle has some significance in that in April 1973 some friends and I walked across the trestle after my friend’s car broke down and we parked it at an abandoned gas station near the railroad tracks. We followed the tracks and walked across the trestle to get to the house of my friend’s brother.
This was the first time I’d tried taking B6 before bed. I’ve read the B6 can be helpful for more vivid lucid dreams. Probably less significant is that in the last couple of days, I’ve been having more WTF moments in waking reality than I usually do.
What I’m reading
I’m still reading Lucid Dreams: Gateway to the Inner Self by Robert Waggoner. I’m finding that many of the things he’s talking about regarding the unconscious and the awareness behind the awareness are very similar to ideas I’ve been pondering. He came to them through lucid dreaming while I was thinking about them more in terms of yoga (the Vedas) and imagining what may lie beyond quantum physics.
What I’ve been working on
In addition to reading books by Robert Waggoner and Charlie Morley, I’ve been listening to YouTube videos on lucid dreaming and I’m working on having lucid dreams myself. I’ve been concentrating on recalling my dreams and I’m making progress there. I don’t remember dreams every night but I do most nights now. Last week I remembered dreams 5 days in a row. I’m writing them down to try to get familiar with my dream environment but so far I’m not seeing many common threads or themes in them.
I’ve gone through my personal journals and extracted dreams I’ve recorded over the past couple of years and noticed a few recurring themes in them. I’d had several dreams with military themes in which people I worked with in the service were dream characters. There were also several dreams that took place in classrooms or other academic settings. I’ve also had dreams in which I’d be navigating maze-like corridors and tunnels. Other dreams were set in places like Germany though I could never recall specific locations. In the past I have had dreams featuring deceased relatives as characters, specifically my paternal grandmother, a favorite aunt, and my mother.
I’ve noticed that it takes me a long time to fall asleep, often an hour or more. In a YouTube video, I heard Charline Morley describe insomnia as “the process of trying to fall asleep.” He also described falling asleep as a process of progressive relaxation. I feel pretty relaxed when I go to bed but maybe there’s some tension or stress or issues I’m unaware of.
Quote I’ve been pondering
“The mind can proceed only so far upon what it knows and can prove. There comes a point where the mind takes a leap—call it intuition or what you will— and comes out upon a higher plane of knowledge, but can never prove how it got there. All great discoveries have involved such a leap.” ~ Albert Einstein
One person surveyed, the question is: “If the interior discussion in your head were indexed by category, what would the five most recurring subjects be?” Top five answers are:
- Unfulfilled dreams and aspirations
- Fear, Uncertainty and Doubt (FUD)
- Quieting the voices in my head
- The quest for well-being, balance, focus and inner peace (Samadhi)
- Attaining and maintaining good health
Today’s Song: The End
Dreams, the casualties of my life, lie dead and dying like so much roadkill in the sun. The stench is unbearable.
Life does not stop at 40 or 50 or 60 or 70 or any other age. Life stops when you stop living, then you merely exist until you finally die. Every time a dream dies, a bit of your life dies with it. We have to pursue our dreams and live them the best we can. We must also allow others to live their dreams and not kill them in the pursuit of our own.
Just because you reach a certain age, it doesn’t mean you have to set your dreams up on a shelf or stop doing things that give you pleasure. Granted, dreams and pleasures change as we get older but we should not be forced to give them up or have them taken from us based on some arbitrary factor such as age or some irrational expectation.
Queen – Another One Bites The Dust
Today’s Quote: “Finery is no less alien to virtue…., which is the strength and vigor of the soul. The good man is an athlete who enjoys competing in the nude.” — Jean-Jacques Rousseau, Discourse on the Sciences and the Arts
Here it is, October and where has the year gone? Three quarters of the year has passed by already. I can’t speak for anyone else but I have absolutely nothing to show for it; I’ve accomplished nothing and, realistically, I don’t expect to accomplish anything in the remaining months. September was filled with disappointments although I didn’t experience the disappointment I was most anticipating. Maybe it’ll happen in November.
This month presents opportunities to pursue a dream but I’m hard pressed to come up with any rational justification for following that dream. I’m finding it difficult to justify it to myself, let alone others who might have a say in it. It’s beginning to look as though another one is heading for the shelf. That shelf is getting quite crowded now.
Re: Naked Fear
Another editorial in a Texas newspaper in defense of the teacher: Editorial: A lesson in the art of pleasing parents
It seems as though the school board/administration and the one parent are the only ones who see a problem with this teacher taking her class to the art museum. I still view the incident as a politically convenient means to oust an effective teacher from the ranks of the mediocre.
Despite what school boards and politicians tell us, education is not static; it is a continuing and evolving process. In order to learn you have to push the envelope and leave your comfort zone. It’s a crime for children to grow up to be more ignorant than their parents. I feel that I’m more enlightened than my parents; I hope my kids are more enlightened than I am; and I hope my grandchildren will grow up to be more enlightened than their parents.
Let’s get the school boards and politicians out of the way and let the teachers teach. It’s time to come out of the Dark Ages.
- Previous links:
- Art teacher fired after student saw nude sculpture during trip (Associated Press)
- Naked fear: Frisco school board needs to defend, not suspend, teacher in art uproar (The Houston Chronicle)
- Museum Field Trip Deemed Too Revealing (New York Times)
Loggins & Messina – House on Pooh Corner
Today’s Quote: “Naturism offers a way of being that dares to suggest that who we are without any additions or covering up is all we need to be.” — Phillip Carr-Gomm
Why do I have dreams? What’s the point? They’re all pretty much impossible; I’d have to sever all ties with my reality to realize them. They just end up on the dream shelf where they get pushed to the back and eventually die from neglect.
Paulsen for President in ’08. He’ll do no worse than the incumbent.
How’s that for a campaign slogan? (So what if he’s dead?)
Edit by Kahuna Papa
One week until the third season of Drawn Together
. Mark your calendars and grab your remotes. You might want to make sure the younglings are in bed.
Steve Miller – The Joker
Today’s Quote: “The liberties of a people never were, nor ever will be, secure, when the transactions of their rulers may be concealed from them.” — Patrick Henry
There is a vault. Inside that vault is a special shelf where I keep my unfulfilled dreams. Some dreams sit at front of the shelf, anxiously awaiting fulfillment. Others sit further back, toward the middle, still hoping that someday they will have their chance at becoming reality. Then there are the dreams further back, holding on to only the faintest glimmer of hope that they will be fulfilled, knowing full well that they may never be realized. At the very back of the shelf lie the dreams that have perished through neglect or slaughter. Among the dead are the dreams that have been long forgotten or lie too far back to retrieve.
Here’s a gourmet tip for you. Never get the Hormel® Teriyaki Chicken with rice. It tastes as nasty as it looks and it looks very nasty. It’s really difficult to find microwave meals that are appealing in appearance and taste. What’s up with that?