The Best Laid Plans

Call me insane but I am once again attempting to plan activities for Saturday. For one thing, it will be Pearl Harbor Day, Hiroshima, and Nagasaki for the fleas. It has been ordained by the highest authority; therefore, it will take place. The maple tree needs to be trimmed and those ugly bushes need to be removed while the yard waste disposal facility is still open. Why pay to dump it when I can dump it for free? I have about a dozen old computer cases, assorted paint cans, and some other junk out back that needs to be disposed of. I’m sure that there will be other tasks yet to be determined.

As it’s my destiny to have my plans thwarted, I’m sure something will come up. The weather forecast shows rain for Saturday, which could interfere with my pruning activities. But it shouldn’t affect the bombing; we may just have to go somewhere to escape the agonized cries of a million fleas dying.

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Kitchen Pass

I did see Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban this afternoon. I enjoyed it very much. Granted, there was much from the book that was left out but I think they hit most of the key points. You can always read the books, right? I thought the special effects were very well done. The new Dumbledore will take some getting used to; he doesn’t pull off the role quite as well as Richard Harris but what do you expect? It was also quite apparent that Hermione is growing up. Hubba hubba!

It felt good to get out of the house for a while and get in some enjoyment and relaxation on my own, without adult supervision. I need to do that more often.

Haven’t thought of one

Incidently, Black Magic Woman was originally performed by Fleetwood Mac. It was written by Peter Green when he was with the band. Just thought I’d throw in a little trivia. Oh, and Fleetwood Mac’s version of it rocks (they were more of a blues band before Buckingham and Nicks joined).

I knew I shouldn’t have tried to plan so far ahead. What was I thinking? I’ll try not to do it again, I promise. Can I please see Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban tomorrow? I’ll be good, I promise.

The Meaning of Life

No, I don’t know the meaning of life. If I did, I’d be figuring out a way to cash in on it and make a few bucks. It may be true that money can’t buy happiness but it can pay off what makes your life miserable.

Actually, I found Monty Python’s The Meaning of Life on DVD at Target and I’m going to watch it later this evening. I doubt I’ll find anything truly profound but I certainly could use a few good laughs. And laughter is good for the soul.

I actually have plans for the weekend, well, Saturday anyway. My agenda includes locating the floor and seat of the passenger side of my truck’s cab, eradicating fleas, watching Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban, and mowing the lawn. And if that doesn’t totally wear me out, I may update my genealogy files or some of my web pages. I’m not really sure; I haven’t planned that far ahead in a long time.

Bring out your dead

Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger recently signed a bill outlawing necrophilia in California. It’s about time! What I can’t believe is that it took two years to get it through the legislature. Was there some bleeding-heart liberal saying that what goes on in private between a man and a corpse is their own business? Or was it that the alleged victims never came forward and complained? At least now California’s dead can rest in peace knowing that those who sexually abuse them can finally be prosecuted and face up to eight years in prison. I wonder where the other 49 states stand on this issue.

Schwarzenegger outlaws sex with corpses

The Gray Soldier

He mocks me, that single gray soldier standing in the brown forest. He makes no effort to conceal himself and taunts me saying, “Give it up old man. Put your gun away. You don’t need it anymore. Resistance is futile. Just accept the inevitable and come along quietly.”

But I’m not ready to put my gun away yet nor am I ready to go quietly. I’m not as young as I used to be but I’m not ready for the old folks home, not by a long shot. I’m half tempted to mow down the whole forest to eradicate that solitary gray soldier but that’s too much effort and I’m not sure the barren landscape would be a very pleasant sight. The next time I see him in the forest, I thnk I’ll just take him out. Of course, there will be others to replace him and before I know it, the entire forest will be a sea of gray. It’s inevitable but I intend to resist for as long as I can, as long as the gun still shoots.

Redneck TV

I think I watched more TV last night than I normally do in a week. I was flipping through the channels when I found a Blue Collar TV special on the WB. My favorite sketch was “Hick Eye for the Queer Guy” where Jeff Foxworthy, Larry the Cable Guy, and Bill Engvall do a “Queer Eye” style make over for a gay guy, not even realizing he’s gay. Why not pour a can of chili over Beluga caviar?

After that was a Bill Engvall special, which I’d seen before but was still funny. Then I switched over to Comedy Central for “The Graham Norton Effect.” Marilyn Manson was one of the guests. He’s ugly as sin and I don’t care for his “music” but he’s funny! After that, I went to bed.

In other news, the hallway carpet is dry Yay! And for the second Friday in a row, Tina doesn’t have to show up for jury duty. Yay! Oh, the other night Jake noticed that I had fixed the toilet because he only had to use the handle once to flush it.

I am going to try to accomplish something this weekend. I’m sure there’s a floor and a seat on the passenger side of my truck. At least there was a week or so ago. Has anyone seen my computer desk? I last saw it in my room under the computer. I’m sure it hasn’t gone far.