Self-service checkouts

Song: If It Makes You Happy
Artist: Sheryl Crow
Album: Sheryl Crow
Released: 1996


Today’s Quote: ” To read a newspaper is to refrain from reading something worthwhile. The first discipline of education must therefore be to refuse resolutely to feed the mind with canned chatter.” ~ Aleister Crowley


I hate using self-service checkouts in stores. In my opinion they represent the pinnacle of technology whose usefulness is far outweighed by its annoyance. Half the time, it doesn’t scan the item properly the first time and if it can’t figure it out, it tells you to find an employee to enter it for you. It complains if you don’t immediately put the item in a bag, take the item out of the bag, or if you remove the bag from the carousel before completing the financial transaction. In stores like Wal*Mart, there’s always a good chance you’ll have an item that, by its very nature, requires a store employee to specifically “authorize” you to purchase said item. If you ask me, self-service checkouts may save the store money by cutting labor costs but, as a customer, they’re inconvenient and highly overrated.


Eight terms and their gender specific definitions

THINGY:
Female – Any part under the hood of the car.
Male – The strap fastener on a woman’s bra.

VULNERABLE:
Female – Fully opening up one’s self emotionally to another.
Male – Playing hockey without a cup.

COMMUNICATION:
Female – The open sharing of thoughts and feelings with one’s partner.
Male – Leaving a note before taking off on a fishing trip with the guys.

ENTERTAINMENT:
Female – A good movie, concert, play or book.
Male – Anything that can be done while drinking beer.

COMMITMENT:
Female – A desire to get married and raise a family.
Male – Trying not to hit on other women while out with this one.

FLATULENCE:
Female – An embarrassing byproduct of indigestion.
Male – A source of entertainment, self expression and male bonding.

MAKING LOVE:
Female – The greatest expression of intimacy a couple can achieve.
Male – Call it what you want just as long as we do it.

REMOTE CONTROL:
Female – A device for changing one TV channel to another.
Male – A device for scanning through all 375 channels every five minutes.

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Author: Rick

I'm a simple man, trying to make my way in the universe.