Bring you parachute and your towel

Today’s Quote: “Having one child makes you a parent; having two you are a referee.” — David Frost

Why Do They Hate Us So Much?
This interesting piece by Harry Browne highlights the foreign policy of our beloved presidents of the 20th and 21st centuries. The world has been hating us since 1898 when we “liberated” the Philippines and established American imperialism off the North American continent for the first time. Up to that point, we’d really only pissed off the British, the Canadians, and the Mexicans. And now George keeps giving the world more reasons to hate us. We need a president with a knowledge of history (world and American) and geography.

[Edit 19 Mar 2010]

Actually, other nations probably began hating us and our foreign policy as early as 1853 when our navy steamed into Tokyo Harbor and told them to open up their borders or we’d bombard the shit out of them. Of course, a samurai sword is no match for naval artillery so they capitulated and subsequently modernized, thus setting the stage for the Pacific theater of WWII as well as the eventual demise of our auto and steel industries.

Man vs Wild
I couldn’t find much else on the telly last night so I started to watch Man vs Wild on the Discovery Channel. He was in the French Alps where climbers and skiers regularly get into trouble and he was going to show me how to survive should I get lost in the Alps.

The first thing he did was parachute onto a glacier and show me how to make a knotted rope from the parachute cord and fill the parachute with snow to act as an anchor should I accidentally fall into a deep crevasse. Like, how many skiers and mountain climbers actually drop into the Alps like an invading paratrooper? He said that if I didn’t have a parachute, I could fill my backpack with snow to serve the same purpose. (Okay, what do I do with all the crap I need to survive that was in the backpack?)

He went on to demonstrate how to make a snow cave in case I have to spend the night on top of the mountain (and can’t find a ski lodge). If I don’t have a shovel (and why wouldn’t I be carrying one on a ski trip?), I can use the plastic panel from my parachute harness. He suggested I use the parachute as bedding to insulate my ass from the snow underneath me.

That was about all I could absorb so while he was freezing his ass off in his Alpine snow cave, I turned off the TV and climbed in to my warm bed. The lesson here? Always bring a parachute when skiing or mountain climbing in the Alps. Or at least bring a shovel and an extra backpack filled with snow. (It goes without saying that you should always bring your towel.)

DreamboatannieSong: Magic Man
Artist: Heart
Album: Dreamboat Annie
Year: 1976


Author: Rick

I'm a simple man, trying to make my way in the universe.