Steely Dan – My Old School
Today’s Quote: “This was life! Ah, how he loved it! Civilization held nothing like this in its narrow and circumscribed sphere, hemmed in by restrictions and conventionalities. Even clothes were a hindrance and a nuisance. At last he was free. He had not realized what a prisoner he had been.” — Edgar Rice Burroughs, Tarzan of the Apes
Today I’m naked by choice; I just haven’t gotten around to getting dressed yet. However, I have not chosen to be hungry. There isn’t much that I can eat in the house. We have plenty of eggs but do I really need all that cholesterol? I only know three ways to prepare eggs and I’m only good at one of them.
Didn’t we just go grocery shopping a week ago? Why do two weeks worth of groceries last less than a week? I don’t understand it. There seems to be a lot of pasta on the shelf and I don’t think I should be eating as much pasta as I have been. Is there some reason I should not have a selection of foods that are easy to prepare and are healthy. Some fruit would be nice. How about some celery and carrots with some Lite Ranch for dipping? No one seems to understand my desire to lose a few pounds the old fashioned way, through a sensible diet and exercise. (A weight loss rant is in the works.)
Hunger adversely affects the brain. I’m done ranting for now.
More Product Warnings
Dumb and Funny Warning Labels On Products:
- Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: Product will be hot after heating.
- Packaging for a Rowenta iron: Do not iron clothes on body.
- Boot’s Children’s cough medicine: Do not drive car or operate machinery.
- Nytol sleep aid: Warning: may cause drowsiness.
- String of Chinese-made Christmas lights: For indoor or outdoor use only.
- Japanese food processor: Not to be used for the other use.
- Sainsbury’s peanuts: Warning: contains nuts.
- Korean kitchen knife: Warning keep out of children.
- Helmet mounted mirror used by us cyclists: Remember, objects in the mirror are actually behind you.
- New Zealand insect spray: This product not tested on animals.
- Blanket from Taiwan: not to be used as protection from a tornado.
- Cardboard windshield sun shade: Warning: Do Not Drive With Sun Shield in Place.
- Bottle of shampoo for dogs: Caution: The contents of this bottle should not be fed to fish.
- Curling Iron: Warning: This product can burn eyes.
- Hair Dryer: Do not use in shower.
- Hand-held Massaging Device: Do not use while sleeping or unconscious.
- Case of a chocolate CD in a gift basket:. Do not place this product into any electronic equipment.
- A toilet at a public sports facility: Recycled flush water unsafe for drinking.
- Pair of shin guards made for bicyclists: Shin pads cannot protect any part of the body they do not cover.
- Container of Underarm Deodorant: Caution: Do not spray in eyes.
- Aim-n-Flame fireplace lighter: Do not use near fire, flame, or sparks.
- Toner cartridge for a laser printer: Do not eat toner.
- 13-inch wheel on a wheelbarrow: Not intended for highway use.
- Can of self-defense pepper spray: May irritate eyes.
- Novelty rock garden set called “Popcorn Rock”: Eating rocks may lead to broken teeth.
- A Frisbee: Warning: May contain small parts.
- A toilet bowl cleaning brush: Do not use orally.
- A birthday card for a 1 year old: Not suitable for children aged 36 months or less.
- Heated seat cushion: Warning: Do not use on eyes.
- Infant’s bathtub: Do not throw baby out with bath water.
- Package of Fisherman’s Friend throat lozenges: Not meant as substitute for human companionship.
My Old School by Steely Dan, Countdown to Ecstasy (1973)
Well I did not think the girl
Could be so cruel
And I’m never going back
To my old school