I am blasphemer, hear me rant!

ZZ Top – Under Pressure

Today’s Quote: “Stop Making Crap.” — PC World Contributing Editor Stephen Manes offers some parting advice to Microsoft Chairman Bill Gates. (A little late for that advice, don’t you think?)

What is it with Dayton drivers? They can’t drive when there’s snow on the road. They can’t drive when there’s rain on the road. They can’t seem to manage it when there’s sunshine on the road. Maybe weather isn’t the problem. I think it’s that they can’t drive when there are cars on the road!

It took me an hour to move 17 miles. Was there a terrible accident on either side of the road? None that I could see. All I saw was a vast sea of stupidity. I’ve driven the Washington Beltway during rush hour and I’d rather endure that than the reasonably, sort of straight, four mile stretch of I-75 through downtown Dayton. Why is everyone in such a big hurry to be stuck in traffic? If everyone drove like they were supposed to, followed the rules, and anticipated what they needed to do, it would flow smoothly. Yeah, I’m blasphemer and a heretic. So what?

Sometimes I think about someday when I retire I’ll move out in the country and not have to deal with it. Oh, wait. That’s not going to happen. First of all, urban sprawl will eventually assimilate all available land because the United States Supreme Court says that we have to give up our land to accommodate urban sprawl.

Secondly, I’m not going to retire. After I retire from my current “career,” I’ll be picking up a blue smock so I can be assimilated into the world’s most evil retail organization. Or maybe it will be a red shirt and paper hat in the world’s most evil fast food chain and I’ll be saying intelligent things like “Would you like fries with that?” and “I’m lovin’ it” (with a fake pasted on smile) while I explain to high school graduates how to make change for a five. By God, they’ll have to pry the mop from my cold, dead fingers. Bleak, the future is.


Author: Rick

I'm a simple man, trying to make my way in the universe.