Ready to Evaluate

The Beatles – Rocky Raccoon

Today’s Quote: “Uncontrolled diabetes can ruin a person’s life as much as uncontrolled schizophrenia.” — Dr. John Newcomer, a professor of psychiatry at Washington University School of Medicine in St. Louis. [It really sucks when you have both.]

I guess the purveyors of windows, patio doors, and gutter guards weren’t that interested in trying to sell me some. They were supposed to call Saturday and “confirm” the “appointment.” Maybe they did but didn’t leave a message. Who would have thought sales people would give up so easily? It’s just as well; my bankrupt ass can’t afford such luxuries.

For this evening’s dining pleasure I feasted on Mac & Cheese chicken sandwiches with a little Mac & Cheese on the side. Oh, how my taste buds did a happy dance. I noticed a recipe on the label of the Miracle Whip so I read it, thinking it might be something scrumptious that would make my taste buds river dance or something. I was just a bit disappointed to find it was a recipe for a classic turkey sandwich. Thank you, Kraft. To think I might have been doing it wrong all these years.

Among the junk mail that’s arrived in our mailbox over the past week or so, there was a card telling my wife that she may qualify for a free mammogram. There’s something you don’t want to pass up. When I saw that it was from the Breast Evaluation Center, my first thought was, “where do I apply?” I may lack the qualifications to evaluate them medically but I feel I’m well qualified to evaluate breasts aesthetically (size, shape, texture, firmness, etc.). And yes, I realize that breast cancer is very serious and that mammograms play an important role in early detection.

“There’s a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. It would be a pity to damage yours.” — Wesley to Princess Buttercup as she prepares to commit suicide with a dagger because she thinks she has married Prince Humperdink

I fondly remember this one time at the hospital, I was in for some eye surgery and this lovely young nursing student was looking after me. She explained that men could get breast cancer too and gave me a breast exam. I offered to return the favor but she politely declined my offer. I also recall that she insisted on giving me the shot in the ass just before I went into surgery. Not the first woman to see my naked ass, nor the last.

Music Trivia Quiz:
1. What was the name of Elvis Presley’s original back-up band? A) The Blue Suede Boys B) The Memphis Boys C) The Blue Moon Boys
2. Which song was Linda Ronstadt first number one hit? A) You’re No Good B) When Will I Be Loved C) Heat Wave
3. How old was Felix Mendelssohn when he composed the overture to A Midsummer Night’s Dream? A) 17 B) 37 C) 77
4. What is the first name of the artist Newton who had a hit with Angel of the Morning? A) Fig B) Randi C) Juice
5. Who wrote Whitney Houston’s 1992 hit, I Will Always Love You? A) Dolly Parton B) Linda Ronstadt C) Christine McVie

Music Trivia Answers:
1. C) The Blue Moon Boys
2. A) You’re No Good [Written by Clint Ballard, Jr., it was originally recorded by Betty Everett who had a hit with The Shoop Shoop Song (It’s In His Kiss). (].
3. A) 17
4. C) Juice [Evie Sands originally recorded Angel of the Morning in 1967. Her version was doing well, but two weeks after it was released her record label, Cameo/Parkway, went bankrupt. Chip Taylor, who wrote and produced this, was devastated when he found out that the label could not promote it or even make more singles of it. A few months later, Merrilee Rush’s version became a hit for another label. Juice Newton recorded it in 1981. ( I think it’s a great song and I’d love to hear the earlier versions. Chip Taylor also wrote and recorded Wild Thing as a member of The Troggs. He is the brother of actor Jon Voight and the uncle of Angelina Jolie. (]
5. A) Dolly Parton [Dolly Parton wrote this and did the original version in 1974, which went to #1 on the Country charts that year. She recorded another version for the 1982 movie The Best Little Whorehouse In Texas, which also hit #1 on the country charts. She wrote the song after the breakup of the musical partnership she had with country singer Porter Wagoner. They were never romantically involved. (“Lookee here, Por-tah!”) has two references to the song, one for Dolly Parton’s original version and another for Whitney Houston’s cover. I prefer Dolly’s version.]

Interestingly, I Will Always Love You is really a break-up song although it gets played at a lot of weddings (maybe there’s a link there). People don’t listen to the lyrics. They take one line of out context and decide that it’s a certain kind of song. Same thing with Born in the U.S.A. People hear the line “I was born in the U.S.A.” and think it’s a patriotic song. Of course, the state of popular music today is proof that nobody listens to the lyrics.

Oh, yeah, I knew 2, 4, and 5. Incidentally, Eric Braun was only 17 when he played guitar on In-A-Gadda-Da-Vida with Iron Butterfly. He’d only been playing for 3 months.


Author: Rick

I'm a simple man, trying to make my way in the universe.