Colon Education

Eddie “Cleanhead” Vinson – Kidney Stew

Today’s Quote: “The future, what’s that?” — Belisario, one of a group of hunter-gatherers who left the Colombian jungle to join the modern world. [I’m sure nothing good will come of joining the modern world.]

“Colon Education” class was interesting. I didn’t learn much new about my colon except that it’s like a slinky. My appointment is the 31st so I’ll have to start my liquid diet in the middle of Memorial Day weekend. I’ll have a lime jello burger, please, no bread.

I’ll have to take a couple of days off work since I have to take an industrial strength laxative the day before and they strongly advised me to stay within sight of a toilet for at least 12 hours after taking it. And I have to take two doses. I’m thinking Depends might be in order here.

They’ll be giving me a sedative that wipes out short term memory (worse than normal). I have to have someone drive me to and from the appointment and keep an eye on me for the rest of the day. They strongly advised me not to see a lawyer that day because if I were to sign a legal document, I’d have no recollection of it. It might be a good idea not to send any flaming e-mails that day or post blog and journal entries. I could be surprised the next day. It’s quite possible the whole day could be a total blank in the memory banks. Oh, it’s just going to be so much fun but I probably won’t remember any of it.

Music Trivia Quiz:
1. Who first recorded Me and Mrs. Jones in 1972? A) Lou Rawls B) Quincy Jones C) Billy Paul
2. In which song did they “paved paradise and put up a parking lot”? A) California Dreamin’ B) Big Yellow Taxi C) Cadillac Ranch
3. What movie theme was Barbra Streisand’s first chart-topping single? A) Evergreen B) The Way We Were C) On a Clear Day You Can See Forever
4. Who first performed Colour My World? A) Chicago B) The Eagles C) Joe Cocker
5. Who sings She’s Not the Cheatin’ Kind? A) Lonestar B) George Strait C) Brooks and Dunn

Music Trivia Answers:
1. C) Billy Paul [Me and Mrs. Jones was written by Kenny Gamble, Leon Huff and Carey Gilbert. This song is about marital infidelity and a hint about this song’s subject matter is cleverly “hidden” in its intro: the saxophone is playing the first line from a 1954 Doris Day hit entitled Secret Love. (]
2. B) Big Yellow Taxi [Joni Mitchell got the idea for the song during a visit to Hawaii. She looked out of her hotel window at the spectacular Pacific mountain scenery, and then down to a parking lot. (]
3. The Way We Were
4. A) Chicago [Colour My World was written by Chicago’s trombone player, Jimmy Pankow, and sung by Terry Kath. After Kath’s death in 1978, the band did not play this song for several years. It became a concert favorite once again, with Bill Champlin singing it when they started playing it again. Robert Lamm does it now. (]
5. C) Brooks and Dunn

I got 1 through 4 without even thinking about them. As for # 5, what the hell do I know about “modern” country music?


Author: Rick

I'm a simple man, trying to make my way in the universe.