The Ravings Of Mad Men And Other Stories

Lightnin’ Hopkins – Bring Me My Shotgun

Today’s Quote: “America, you lost, you lost!” — Zacarias Moussaoui, after being sentenced to life in prison.

Quite possibly the ravings of a mad man but there is some truth to his words. In a way, the terrorists have won. They have made us a paranoid nation, they have made us reactionary rather than proactive and progressive. Because of 9/11, we have allowed the administration of King George to take away essential liberties and rights in the name of alleged security. It was Ben Franklin who said, “Those that can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety.” (Our founding fathers were smart men and they put a lot of serious thought into the great experiment they were launching. We really should listen to them.)

We are no safer now than we were four and a half years ago. If anything, we are in greater danger since we know the government is incapable of effectively responding, unless the response requires the expenditure of large quantities of munitions. We may have superior firepower but Al Qaeda has the ability to blend in and bide their time. The terrorists only need to wait and pick the opportune time and place to strike.

Of course, the terrorists are boneheads too. They really need to rethink the whole suicide bomber idea. Yes, they are creating martyrs. In a suicide bombing, every victim becomes a martyr. But the suicide bomber? He’s just a suicide, forever damned and banished from Paradise. He doesn’t get any virgins, just bufu’d in Hell for all eternity.

I’ve been hearing a lot of talk about Congress wanting to dismantle FEMA. Before being absorbed and rendered ineffective by the Department of Homeland Security, they did a pretty good job of responding to natural disasters and the like. I propose they dismantle the Department of Homeland Security instead. All the agencies they brought under the umbrella of Homeland Security, actually functioned reasonably well until some bureaucrat dreamed up DHS as a knee-jerk reaction to 9/11. (Probably ate some chili dogs just before going to bed.)

What needs to happen is for the people who screwed up, starting at the very top, to go on national TV, raise their hand, and say, “I fucked up. Fire my lame ass and get somebody who’s competent to do the job.” Then they need to step aside, go to the back of the line and start doing the grunt work to clean up their mess.

Mr. Brown, you were in charge of FEMA when Katrina hit and you had no clue what the hell was going on. I want you to go to New Orleans, pick up a shovel, and start building a levee. Compensation, you ask? Minimum wage until you prove you’re competent enough to earn more. Mr. Bush and Mr. Cheney, same deal as Mr. Brown, but since you’re oil men, you get to pump gas for a living.

Music Trivia Quiz:
1. Who had the number one hit in 1975 called Listen to What the Man Said? A) Wings B) The Staple Singers C) The Doobie Brothers
2. What was Paul Simon’s first new song recorded without Art Garfunkel? A) Mother and Child Reunion B) Kodachrome C) Loves Me Like a Rock
3. Who recorded the 1965 number one hit Hang on Sloopy? A) Herman’s Hermit B) The McCoys C) Jan & Dean
4. For which group did Jimmy Page play guitar? A) Led Zeppelin B) Traffic C) The Grateful Dead
5. What song has the lyric, “When the moon meets your eye like a big pizza pie”? A) O Sole Mio B) Volare C) That’s Amore

Music Trivia Answers:
1. A) Wings
2. A) Mother and Child Reunion [It was his first solo hit and Simon is said to have written it after seeing a chicken and egg dish called “Mother and Child Reunion” on the menu at 456 Restaurant in Chinatown, New York. ( It is the first track on the first side of his 1972 album Paul Simon. (It is a very good album, by the way, and in my vinyl collection.) Kodachrome and Loves Me Like a Rock are from his 1973 album There Goes Rhymin’ Simon.]
3. B) The McCoys [It was originally recorded by the R&B group The Vibrations as My Girl Sloopy in 1964. The McCoys started out as Rick And The Raiders, a group led by guitarist and lead singer Rick Derringer. In 1965, Rick And The Raiders played a Dayton, Ohio concert as the backup band for The Strangeloves, who were a group of producers who wrote the song I Want Candy and made up a group for it. In a strange and brilliant marketing move, The Strangeloves claimed they were from Australia and said they were shepherds who got rich by crossbreeding sheep. The Strangeloves – Bob Feldman, Jerry Goldstein and Richard Gottehrer – arranged a recording session with Rick And The Raiders, who changed their name to The McCoys (after a Ventures song), and had them record a version of My Girl Sloopy as Hang on Sloopy. Most of the group joined Johnny Winter’s backup band in the early ’70s, and in 1973 Rick Derringer joined the Edgar Winter group as lead guitarist and vocalist, after which he had a successful hard rock solo career. This became the official the rock song of the state of Ohio in 1985. The Ohio State University Marching Band first played their arrangement of the song on October 9, 1965 at the Ohio State-Illinois football game.
4. A) Led Zeppelin [Before Led Zeppelin, he played bass and later replaced Jeff Beck in The Yardbirds. Before joining The Yardbirds, he was a session musician and was recommended by Clapton to be his replacement.]
5. C) That’s Amore [I remember hearing that sung by Dean Martin.]

Guess what!? I’m five for five today! My self-esteem is off the chart!


Author: Rick

I'm a simple man, trying to make my way in the universe.